We all experience moments where we make choices—frequently on strong emotional impulses—that we previously intended to avoid or make differently. These moments not only bring on unwanted consequences: they can also trigger self-judgment, frustration, and fear when we feel we’re not in control of our own actions, or as if we don’t have the ability to change our own behaviors despite desperately wanting to. It’s true that our biology and brain chemistry play a strong role in our instincts and habits, but it’s also true that we all have tremendous capacity to change or adjust our own behavior. It’s not necessarily a matter of pure willpower, but of understanding the deep-rooted relationships between our bodies, thoughts, behaviors, and feelings.