By Wendy Lu — 2016
Women with disabilities often begin to date much later in life, and they struggle in a dating culture that places a premium on physical appearance.
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Relationships that are successful tend to take the attitude: "How can I help you?" "How can I enrich your life?" "How can I be a better husband to you," if it's a marriage. "How can I be a better wife to you?" And what we want to do is to enhance each other's lives.
The concept of the “love languages,” then, is a gentle reminder of something that is at once obvious and easy to forget: Not everyone experiences the world in the exact same way that you do. Not even your partner.
While some people feel the most loved when they hear the words “I love you,” for folks with the acts of service love language, it’s more meaningful when you actually do something to show them your love. In other words, actions speak louder than words.
The better you know yourself, the better you can help others know you. And the more others know you, the more they are able to love you the way you want. That stands for everyone in your life, including friends.
Perhaps what people misunderstand about the love-languages theory is similar to what they often misunderstand about love itself: that considering the needs and wants of the other person first and then adjusting your own behavior—and not expecting it to work the other way around—is what makes the...
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