By Arash Emamzadeh — 2019
Psychology of compassion is discussed (part 2)
Read on www.psychologytoday.com
CLEAR ALL
At a weekend workshop I led, one of the participants, Marian, shared her story about the shame and guilt that had tortured her.
1
How do shame and compassion relate to one another?
In 1989, at one of the first international Buddhist teacher meetings, Western teachers brought up the enormous problem of unworthiness and self-criticism, shame and self-hatred that frequently they arise in Western students’ practice.
Our culture has taught us that we do not have the privilege of being vulnerable like other communities.
I am not the only one that has uttered something shitty to their kid. Everyone has had their asshole parent moment(s)(s)(s) while dealing with a kid. But no one really knows that we are all asshole parents because we all suffer in silence over our own parenting disgrace.
The pandemic has exacerbated the isolation of early motherhood; some apps are trying to create a safer space for new moms.
When shame takes over, all we want is to get out of its discomfort—and in order to do so we often end up invalidating the other person involved to help ourselves feel better.
A trend that is unfortunately common with individuals and mothers in this generation is “Mom Shaming,” which generally speaking is criticizing a mother for making choices for her child(ren) because they differ from the choices the criticizing person would make.
Taking a close look at the elephant hidden in plain sight.
With myriad back-to-school options to choose from, moms’ groups have hit judgment overload.