ARTICLE

FindCenter AddIcon

Criticism Is the Toxic Habit that Can Slowly Ruin Your Relationship

By Kelsey Borresen — 2019

Experts say this common communication issue can push couples apart.

Read on www.huffpost.com

FindCenter Post-Image
03:26

See How this Single Question Saved a Marriage

This story is about a situation where Todd, a husband, almost left his wife and kids, and the wife found a way to ask one non-defensive question that led to a conversation that saved the marriage.

Video
Sharon Strand Ellison
2013
FindCenter AddIcon
FindCenter Post-Image
05:06

Parents Argue Over Popular Daughter Who Is Rude at Home

This story is about a mom and a step-dad who had argued a lot over a teenage daughter who was rude and home and unwilling to do her part. The step-dad shifted to using a non-defensive statement and got very different results.

Video
Sharon Strand Ellison
2013
FindCenter AddIcon
FindCenter Post-Image

Beginning Anew: Four Steps to Restoring Communication

When we’re upset with someone, we’re often afraid to say anything. We tell ourselves, “Oh, it’s just a small matter; it’s not important.” But the accumulation of many small issues can create an explosive situation, and can even cause relationships to break.

Book
Sister Chan Khong
2014
FindCenter AddIcon
FindCenter Post-Image
05:51

How Would You Feel if You Could Easily Set Limits & Be More Respected?

So often when we set limits it is with an agenda. We want a certain result and are upset if we don't get it. Here I talk about how to set limits that really work, but it requires not trying to control "which choice" the other child or adult makes.

Video
Sharon Strand Ellison
2013
FindCenter AddIcon
FindCenter Post-Image
03:16

Harassment in the Workplace

This story is about a young woman who was being sexually harassed by her supervisor and was able to ask a question that prompted the supervisor to completely shift his behavior.

Video
Sharon Strand Ellison
2013
FindCenter AddIcon
FindCenter Post-Image
04:33

Why Can’t We Think Straight When We Get Defensive?

Defensiveness lives in our bodies; It’s not just a matter of controlling ourselves; the minute we feel any kind of threat it takes over. So how to we get rid of it?

Video
Sharon Strand Ellison
2013
FindCenter AddIcon
FindCenter Post-Image
04:12

How Can Simple Curious Questions Have Such Disarming Power?

We are used to asking questions in ways that convey judgment and/or are interrogating or entrapping. Much of the body language and tone we use is unconscious. To be real, a question needs to be based on pure curiosity, but it's easier said than done.

Video
Sharon Strand Ellison
2013
FindCenter AddIcon
FindCenter Post-Image
02:06

Ego and Defensiveness in Communication: Sharon Strand Ellison

Sharon Strand Ellison, the author of Taking the War Out of Our Words, is a pioneer in the field of eliminating defensiveness. An international communication consultant and award-winning speaker, Sharon is the Founder and Executive Director of the Institute for Powerful Non-Defensive Communication.

Video
Sharon Strand Ellison
2017
FindCenter AddIcon
FindCenter Post-Image

Taking the War Out of Our Words: The Art of Powerful Non-Defensive Communication

Whether we are dealing with a rude clerk, our child saying, “That’s not fair!,” our spouse ignoring us, or an uncooperative co-worker, in our struggle to respond effectively, we often become defensive—sometimes without even realizing it.

Book
Sharon Strand Ellison
2025
FindCenter AddIcon
FindCenter Post-Image

The Secret Life of Pronouns: What Our Words Say About Us

In The Secret Life of Pronouns, social psychologist and language expert James W.

Book
James W. Pennebaker
2025
FindCenter AddIcon

EXPLORE TOPIC

Criticism and Rejection