By Steve Friedman — 2019
How can a spurned lover make his case? In this essay — the first Modern Love column ever published, exactly 15 years ago — one writer counts the ways.
Read on www.nytimes.com
CLEAR ALL
If your spouse cheated and you're grappling with what to do, know that there's no rush to make a decision. After all, this is perhaps one of the most significant decisions you'll make in your life, so take time to think about what would be best for you.
There are some things that you can do and say that will support your loved one’s healing process.
Show up, and keep showing up. Pizza helps, too.
For gay couples, the promise of marriage is still so new and incomplete that the idea of matrimonial courts, equitable settlements, and all the rest barely registers. How do you process the undoing of a bond that until a moment ago in history you were not allowed to form?
A new rule requiring a cooling-off period before a divorce could be granted led to an outcry, as well as a surge of applications to beat the deadline.
It wasn’t a big deal to me when I was married. But it was a big deal to her.
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A divorce experts weighs in on handling the specific stressors, bias, and a legacy that will take time to change.
Leaning on your support network, consuming information with care, and being present with your children all help you stay healthy during such a difficult and stressful time.
You’ll emerge stronger, wiser, courageous, and bolder than before.
Use “negative reappraisal,” and understand you have work to do—time alone may not be enough.