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Keeping Marriages Healthy, and Why It’s So Difficult

After two people stand before everyone important to them in the world and publicly declare that they love each other and intend to remain together for the rest of their lives, everything social psychology has learned about the stability of publicly declared opinions suggests that these will be the most stable opinions of all (Festinger, 1957). Yet of course they aren’t.

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How Withholding Can Lead to Divorce

Withholding, what is it? Well it is a defined as an emotionally abusive behavior or tactic, a form of denying, refusing to communicate or do something for your partner as a punishment.

Article
Tiffany Beverlin
2017
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“Withholders” vs. “Conceders”: A Damaging Conflict Pattern

Relationship dances between these two types can become very complicated.

Article
Randi Gunther
2018
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Harville Hendrix Wants to Save America, One Marriage at a Time

What happens when marriage counselors want to heal society? Relationship gurus Harville Hendrix (called the “marriage whisperer” by Oprah) and his wife, Helen LaKelly Hunt, are so convinced that keeping couples together is the key to societal happiness and prosperity that they have launched a...

Article
Pacific Standard
2017
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The One Thing You Need to Do to Save Your Marriage

Harville Hendrix and Helen LaKelly Hunt, authors of Making Marriage Simple: 10 Truths for Changing the Relationship You Have into the One You Want, reveal a strategy they discovered in their own struggles, which can lead to a massive, permanent turnaround.

Article
Leigh Newman
2013
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The Art of Listening: An Interview with Harville Hendrix and Helen LaKelly Hunt

1440: Is it true that on the whole we're not very good listeners? Harville: In the resting state, when we're not distracted, the research shows we have a 13–18% accuracy rate.

Article
Jenn Brown
2019
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The Marriage Repair Kit

When we fall in love, we see life in Technicolor. We nibble each other's ears and tell each other everything; our limitations and rigidities melt away. We're sexier, smarter, funnier, more giving. We feel whole; we're connected.

Article
Harville Hendrix and Helen LaKelly Hunt
2003
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What Wedding Vows and Other Commitments Get Wrong

When you are not emotionally transparent, it creates a negative domino effect. You build up resentment and start acting differently towards your partner, which in turn creates distance in your relationship.

Article
Kathlyn Hendricks and Gay Hendricks
2015
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Relationship Epidemic: Shutting Out Body Wisdom

Most of us struggle at one time or another with an inability to feel what’s going on inside us at the level of emotion and energy flow. The technical term for this problem is “alexithymia.”

Article
Kathlyn Hendricks, Gay Hendricks
2010
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How Your Mother Can Improve Your Love Life. ~ Mark Wolynn

When you think of your mother, does your heart open with compassion or tighten with resentment? Do you allow yourself to feel her tenderness and care? The way we receive our mother’s love can be similar to how we experience love from a partner.

Article
Mark Wolynn
2013
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My Friend Is Dating Someone Terrible, Or, Secrets of the Darth Vader Boyfriend

You can’t talk someone out of being in love with Darth Vader, and sadly, the worse it gets the more your friend might try to talk himself into trying to make it work because if there is a happy ending all the ways he’s had to abase himself to stay in the relationship will have been “worth it.

Article
Jennifer Peepas
2011
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Marriage