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What’s Really Going on in Your Life?

By Martha Beck — 2020

You’re certain you know what your problem is. Fabulous, says Martha Beck—unless it’s distracting you from an even more alarming issue. O’s life coach goes deep.

Read on www.oprah.com

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Only through our connectedness to others can we really know and enhance the self. And only through working on the self can we begin to enhance our connectedness to others.

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Harriet Lerner
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People’s sense of self-worth is pivotal to their ability to look clearly at the hurt they’ve caused. The more solid one’s sense of self regard, the more likely that that person can feel empathy and compassion for the hurt party, and apologize from an authentic center.

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Harriet Lerner
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Anger is a tool for change when it challenges us to become more of an expert on the self and less of an expert on others.

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Harriet Lerner
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We cannot make another person change his or her steps to an old dance, but if we change our own steps, the dance no longer can continue in the same predictable pattern.

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Harriet Lerner
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Respect the fact that all you do and are now has evolved for a good reason and serves an important purpose.

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Harriet Lerner
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When we do not put our primary emotional energy into solving our own problems, we take on other people’s problems as our own.

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Harriet Lerner
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Our society doesn’t promote self-acceptance and it never will. First of all, self-acceptance doesn’t sell products. Capitalism would fall if we liked ourselves the way we are now. Also, people who feel shamed and inadequate themselves tend to pass it on.

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Harriet Lerner
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It is not fear that stops you from doing the brave and true thing in your daily life. Rather, the problem is avoidance. You want to feel comfortable so you avoid doing or saying the thing that will evoke fear and other difficult emotions.

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Harriet Lerner
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The strongest relationships are between two people who can live without each other but don’t want to.

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Harriet Lerner
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EXPLORE TOPIC

Self-Reckoning