By Tara Brach — 2014
Our mindfulness practice is not about vanquishing our thoughts. It’s about becoming aware of the process of thinking so that we are not in a trance—lost inside our thoughts.
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CLEAR ALL
At a retreat in the late 1990s, Buddhist teacher, Mary Orr, told us an eye-opening tale. She was in the middle of a harried day in which she had too much to do and too little time in which to do it.
The “do it all myself” mentality is praised by society as a strong work ethic and tenacious independence. But it’s actually a habit born from trauma and feeling unworthy.
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This post is not going to argue that negative self-talk is always a good thing. Far from it.
Let me be the first to tell you that there’s nothing wrong with you. You may have some patterns to unlearn, some self-love to embrace, and some new behaviors to embody, but seriously, there’s nothing wrong with you.
Whatever your negative self-talk looks like, you know it’s not helping you move forward and make progress in your life. It’s also making you feel like crap.
You can learn to consciously choose to replace your negative thoughts with positive ones that will make your life better.
Most people don’t realize it, but as we go about our daily lives we are constantly thinking about and interpreting the situations we find ourselves in. It’s as though we have an internal voice inside our head that determines how we perceive every situation.
So what is negative self-talk exactly? Basically, trash-talking yourself. It’s always good to consider the ways that we need to improve. But there’s a difference between self-reflection and negative self-talk.
In this article we’ll cover what negative self-talk really is, the most common types of negative self-talk (sometimes called Cognitive Distortions), and some strategies you can use to identify and start to change your own unhelpful negative self-talk.
If you are like most people, you know your inner critic all too well. It is the voice in your head that judges you, doubts you, belittles you, and constantly tells you that you are not good enough.